Your Relationship With Yourself: The Hard Truths You’ve Been Avoiding (Relationship Series)

Enrollment is now open for Listen to Your Body Talk™ Learn More Here:   https://programs.purepossibilities.net/listen-to-your-body-talk-january-2026-B

Today we’re diving into the most important relationship you’ll ever have - the one with yourself. This episode might feel uncomfortable in all the right ways, because I’m sharing some honest truths you may have been avoiding.

Most people don’t stay stuck because they don’t know what to do.
 They stay stuck because deep down, they already know something needs to change…  and they’re terrified to admit it.

Your relationship with yourself shows up in how you talk to yourself, how you override your needs, how you numb, distract, suppress, disconnect, pretend you’re fine, silence your voice, and avoid your truth. And the beautiful part? You can change this relationship - and when you do, everything else in your life shifts with it.

In this episode, we explore self-abandonment, nervous system truth, expression over suppression, and how your body communicates long before your mind does. This is the foundational work we go deeper into inside Listen to Your Body Talk™, and it’s the perfect conversation as we head into the holiday season.

Here are your reflection questions for this week:

✨ Reflection Questions

1. Where in my life am I pretending to be fine when I’m not?
2. What truth have I been afraid to tell myself?
3. What needs or emotions am I currently overriding or suppressing?
4. What would shift if I listened to myself first?
5. What is one small act of self-honesty I can practice this week?

You don’t need to fix anything today.
 Just notice.
 Honesty and curiosity are where everything begins.

Chapters

• 1:56 Grounding Breath And Intentions
• 4:18 The Hard Truth About Staying Stuck
• 7:05 Self-Relationship Revealed In Daily Choices
• 10:09 Expression Over Suppression
• 12:01 Somatics: Listening To Your Body
• 14:36 Reconnecting Improves Every Relationship
• 17:33 Card Pull: Let Relationships Flow
• 19:27 Weekly Reflection Questions
• 21:31 Personal Story And Gentle Honesty

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:58

Welcome back to the Peer Possibilities Podcast. I'm your host, Shannon. And today, this episode might hit some nerves in a good way because I'm going to be talking about things that you have quite possibly been avoiding saying to yourself. So before we dive in, I want to take a moment to breathe together. So let's go ahead and settle our body first because the honest truth can feel a little bit uncomfortable when you've been ignoring it for a while. If it's safe and comfortable for you to do so, gently close your eyes or soften your gaze. If you're driving, go ahead and just breathe with me. Place one hand on your heart or your belly, whatever feels most grounding. Take a slow, deep breath in through your nose. And slowly exhale. Let your shoulders drop. Let your jaw soften. Let your body know it doesn't need to hold anything right now. Take another deep breath in. And slowly release. As we move into this episode, I would like to invite you to stay open. Some of what I'm gonna say may feel uncomfortable, not because it's wrong, but because your body recognizes the truth in it. Simply notice whatever comes up: curiosity, relief, resistance, emotion. Notice it without judging it. You don't need to fix anything, change anything, or decide anything today. Just breathe and stay open to the possibility that something here is meant for you. One more deep breath in. And release with an audible sigh. Okay, let's dive in. Today we're talking about what I believe is the foundation of every single relationship you'll ever have: your relationship with yourself. So last week we talked about all of the different relationships, well, not all of them, but several different relationships that we have. But before we can talk about friendships, family, intimacy, money, food, or any of the external connections in your life, we have to start here. Everything begins with you. You will be with you for the rest of your life, regardless of anyone else who comes and goes. And honestly, most people spend years, sometimes even decades, completely disconnected from themselves without even realizing it. I can attest to this because I did that exact same thing. And it's not because we're doing something wrong, it's not because we're broken, but because we've never been shown any other way. So what I want to talk about today are some honest truths. And these truths might feel uncomfortable, but they are also incredibly freeing once you hear them. Here's the first one. Most people don't stay stuck because they don't know what to do. They stay stuck because deep down they already know something needs to change, and they're absolutely terrified to admit it. It is so much easier to convince yourself that you're fine, that things aren't really that bad, that you can push through, that it's just a season, it's just a chapter, and you'll deal with it later. It's much easier to stay on autopilot or going through the daily motions than to pause long enough to see what's really going on inside of you. But here's the truth that will change your life if you are willing to let it in. Staying on the same path is actually the harder path, not the easier one. That's there's a quote. I have no idea who said it, but I came across it one time and I was like, oh my gosh, that really hits. Is your comfort zone really that comfortable? And I don't believe it is, actually, now that I've been expanding and growing and making myself uncomfortable all the time. So staying on the same path is actually the harder path, not the easier one. The pretending, suppressing, ignoring, the I'm fine, the disconnect, the self-abandonment, when you push down your feelings that you don't want to deal with, that is what keeps people exhausted, overwhelmed, resentful, disconnected, and completely depleted. Here's another truth. Most people are scared to tell themselves the truth. Because once you tell the truth, you can't unknow it. You can't unsee it, you can't pretend anymore. And your whole nervous system knows that telling the truth and being honest with yourself, that something inside of you will shift, and possibly things outside of you will shift. And that's the moment that everything changes. So let's talk honestly about your relationship with yourself. Your relationship with yourself is not a concept, it's an actual lived experience. It shows up in how you talk to yourself, how you override your needs, how you numb or distract when you're overwhelmed, how you choose comfort over truth and honesty, how you shrink to keep the peace, how you suppress your emotions instead of expressing them, how you disconnect from your body, how you pretend to be okay when you're not, how you deny your desires, your dreams, your goals, how you silence your voice. Your relationship with yourself is revealed most clearly in the moments where you abandon or betray yourself. And here's the beautiful part: you can absolutely change the relationship that you have with yourself. And when it changes, everything else changes with it. When you begin to choose what supports you, when you learn how to actually feel your feelings rather than shoving them down and suppressing them, when you speak your truth instead of ignoring it or shoving it down and just swallowing it, when you start to do things that fill you up and nourish you and bring you joy, when you learn how to listen to your body talk instead of overriding what it's telling you, you don't become selfish, you become aligned. And something else happens too, because it's interesting. I have found that something else happens too. Self-care only feels selfish and disturbing and bothersome to people who have not given themselves permission to do it. When you begin to take care of yourself and speak up and rest and honor your needs and listen to your body and choose differently, other people will sometimes have reactions that they don't understand, and then that will make you uncomfortable because they're potentially judging you because your permission threatens their lack of permission. But your job is not to shrink to make other people comfortable. Your job is to stay aligned with the truth of who you are, which takes us into expression over suppression. When you express your feelings in a healthy way, instead of holding them inside, when you start to think differently, choose differently, and respond differently, your entire lived experience changes. You become clearer, you become more grounded, you become more confident, you become more vibrant, you feel more like yourself, you show up more present, more engaged, more joyful. And it's not because you're trying to be better, but because you are no longer pretending, you're no longer depleted from carrying everything inside. And this is where the somatic part comes in. Somatic means of the body. So your relationship with yourself actually lives in your body. Your body tells the truth long before your mind ever does. That's where the feeling comes first. You feel it in your body, and then you start to have a reaction, and then you start thinking and analyzing and processing. When something feels off, when a boundary is needed, it tells you when something feels heavy, when you're abandoning yourself, when you're betraying yourself, when you're ignoring the truth that you already know. If you have ever felt a tightness in your chest, that feeling in your gut, a lump in your throat, a wave of irritation that comes over you, sudden overwhelm, shutdown, emotional numbness, that is your body speaking to you. That is where you need to listen. But most of us were never taught how to listen. And because we weren't taught how to listen to ourselves, we learned to listen to everyone else first, which is why your relationship with you is the foundation of everything. It is the foundation of every single relationship you will have. When you reconnect with yourself, every relationship in your life naturally improves. Not because you're forcing it, not because you try harder, not because you're doing more, but because you're no longer relating to your life from a place of depletion, suppression, or survival. You are relating from truth, presence, clarity, and alignment. And that changes every interaction you have. This is the exact work that we go deeper into inside Listen to Your Body Talk. And there is a reason that I'm sharing this episode the week when the holidays start to ramp up, when so many people are navigating relationships, overwhelm, emotional triggers, old patterns, and self-abandonment. Your relationship with yourself will shape how you move through this season. It will shape how you feel, it will shape what you tolerate, it will shape what you choose, it will shape what you bring into the new year. Go ahead and take another deep breath in and exhale. It's not always easy to be honest with ourselves. And I also believe that until you're honest with yourself about how you feel and tending to that relationship with yourself, things won't like you'll be in the same spot the same time next year as you are today. And if that's what you want, then that's okay. I'm not gonna judge that. However, if you want something different in your life, if you are not loving your current lived experience, you have the power to shift that. And it all starts with you. When we shift things going on internally, it absolutely changes what's going on in our outside environment. It is absolutely an inside job, which is why this is one of the very first episodes that we're talking about, because it is the most important relationship. The one with yourself. All right, we're gonna go ahead and pull a card from the Magic of What If Card Deck Volume Two, available on my website, purepossibilitiespodcast.com. Under shop, you will find all kinds of fun what if merchandise there, including a 2026 desktop calendar. Okay, today's card. What if I lovingly allow relationships to flow in and out of my life? Oh, it took me a while to be able to do that. But it's true, not everyone is meant to be in your life forever. And have you do you ever hear relationships are a reason, a season, or a lifetime? And it's really true because we all grow and change over the years, and a relationship that you maybe had in high school or in elementary school isn't necessarily going to be a relationship that you continue to have later in life, or there's reasons that people are in our life when they are, and we can choose to love and embrace and enjoy those relationships while they're here, and then also appreciate them for what we learned and how we grew and what we gave to each other during that time. But not everyone is meant to stay forever. And so, what if you easily allow relationships to flow in and out of your life? Okay, now holding on to that message, let's move in to this week's reflection questions. If it's safe and comfortable to do so, go ahead and close your eyes or soften your gaze, place your hand on your heart and take a slow deep breath in. And release. Here are your reflection questions for this week. They will also be listed in the show description if you're unable to take the time in this moment to reflect on them. Where in my life am I pretending to be fine when I'm not? What truth have I been afraid to tell myself? What needs or emotions am I currently overriding or suppressing? What would shift if I listened to myself first? What is one small act of self-honesty I can practice this week? Take another deep breath in. And release and allow those questions to land within you. And when you start to really overthink them, that's where I invite you to take a pause. And I totally get it. Being honest with yourself is it is not an easy thing to do. When I I had had several relationships that hadn't worked out. And when I got honest with myself about, you know, obviously it takes more than one person for a relationship with another to not work out. However, my relationship with myself was not great at all. And I had to start identifying what is going on with me as to how am I contributing to these relationships not working out. And when I began to nurture the relationship with myself and be honest with myself, and yeah, it really does suck sometimes because you're admitting things to yourself about maybe the way you're showing up in that relationship, the way you're showing up with the relationship with yourself and how that can impact everything outside of you. It absolutely does. And so this isn't, this isn't, I'm not trying to, you know, have you berate yourself or be mean to yourself, but it's like get honest and curious without judging it. Because what I want for you is to live your best life and be honest with yourself about what is important to you. And when you cultivate that relationship with yourself, it truly does shift all of the relationships outside of you and all of your interactions with people. So just remember, you don't need to fix anything today. This is about curiosity and awareness. And it's not a big, massive overhaul of your life that's happening right in this moment. It's an openness and a willingness to tell yourself the truth. That's where everything begins. Because I believe that not only are people afraid to be honest with themselves, there's a belief there that you can't change your life. And that's something I believed for a long time. And I'm here to tell you that that is absolutely not true. You can absolutely change your lived experience if you choose to do it. I hope you have a beautiful, beautiful day and an amazing week. Much love.